♡ BUTTERFLY HARTLEY

Dragonflies are often seen as symbols of courage, strength and happiness.

When I was a child, my mother gave me a piece of advice that her own mother had given her. It was 'just give it three days'. By that she meant however bad I felt, however awful and end-of-the-world it felt like a situation I was going through was, it would be changed, and soon. Things do get better, if you just keep going forwards. Ever heard the Winston Churchill quote ‘If you're going through hell, keep going’? It's basically the same advice.

I wanted to curate a collection of resources for help, wellbeing and self-care that though not endorsed by me, would be helpful to those needing them, and I will endeavour to keep them checked for suitability. Some will be quite deep, and others light and happy.

Just remember, there's always love in the world, real UNCONDITIONAL LOVE, and that LOVE starts within YOU x

Abortion

https://www.bpas.org/abortion-care/after-an-abortion/ - this particular page deals with abortion aftercare, feelings etc.

https://www.nhs.uk/conditions/abortion/ - what to do if you find yourself in the position of needing an abortion.

Autism/Asperger Syndrome

https://www.youtube.com/user/AtheistRockstar/featured - YouTuber Yo Samedy Sam exploring ‘the autistic experience from every weird corner of my brain and help(ing) others discover themselves, be proud of themselves and change the world, one silly video at a time.’

http://www.aspiengirl.com/ - ‘a positive-only strengths-based platform for neurodiverse individuals to gain knowledge and education and improve their lives. Its tagline is #nomorefemalesleftbehind and #beyourownsuperhero.’

https://www.autism.org.uk/about/what-is/asperger.aspx - Autism, including Asperger syndrome, is much more common than most people think. There are around 700,000 autistic people in the UK – that's more than 1 in 100. This site has a lot of facts and links.

Bereavement

https://www.nhs.uk/livewell/bereavement/Pages/bereavement.aspx - some help if you are struggling with the loss of a loved one.

https://whatsyourgrief.com/grieving-someone-you-didnt-like/ - a blog post offering some advice if you are struggling the loss of someone you didn't like.

Bullying

http://www.bullying.co.uk/ - advice for many types of bullying; including cyber bullying, and bullying at school/university/in the workplace.

http://www.sophielancasterfoundation.com/index.php/hate-crimes - if you are part of a subculture (gothic etc.) and have been bullied for it, this is a site that may be of assistance. The page I have linked has a help information box, with further links. 

Cancer

https://www.clicsargent.org.uk/life-with-cancer/i-have-cancer/ - ‘Your go-to place for everything you might need if you've got cancer, no matter how long you’ve been dealing with it.’ Also excellent advice for those living with another person’s cancer.

https://www.macmillan.org.uk/cancer-information-and-support/diagnosis/teenagers-and-young-adults - ‘If you are a young person who is living with cancer, we have information and support especially for you.’

Childline

https://childline.org.uk/ - Childline provides a 24 hour listening service for all children up to the age of 18 - online, on the phone, anytime. Plenty of help and advice about pretty much any concern you could have, including if you are being abused. You can call the Freephone number 08001111 to talk to someone if you prefer.

Cookery

https://cookingonabootstrap.com/ - for Jack Monroe's excellent budget friendly recipes.

https://biteback2030.com/news/cook-jack-complete-series - ‘£15 weekly shopping lists, healthy recipes and videos’ from chef Jack Deane.

http://www.jamieoliver.com/ - I also recommend his YouTube channel https://www.youtube.com/user/JamieOliver/featured and also signing up for the free All4 app from channel 4 and doing a search for 'Jamie'. His are the cook books I use continuously, particularly 15 & 30 minute meals. Easy, quick and nutritious.

Crafting

http://www.alittlecraftinyourday.com/ - I thought this would be a good site to start with as it seems to have a variety of different techniques you could play around with. Pinterest and of course YouTube can be a great source for craft tutorials and ideas.

https://www.craftsy.com/blog/2015/10/simple-crochet-patterns/ - some great free crochet patterns that are good for beginners. Have a look at Simply Daisy's YouTube https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aAxGTnVNJiE if you need a beginners crash course.

Dadvice

https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCNepEAWZH0TBu7dkxIbluDw - ‘Watch "How To's" playlist from Dad, How Do I?, including How to unclog a sink, how to unclog a bathtub drain, how to fix most running toilets, and more!’

Dressmaking/Refashioning

https://www.youtube.com/user/coolirpa - upcycling and refashions by April, with a new video every week. Includes video guides to using sewing machines.

https://www.youtube.com/user/withwendy - thrift flips and red carpet looks by Wendy.

Domestic Abuse

https://everydaysexism.com/help-support - ‘this (absolutely fantastic link) list currently focuses on UK organisations, but it does include a link to an international inventory of hotlines, shelters, refuges, crisis centres and women’s organizations, searchable by country, with an index of domestic violence resources in over 70 languages.’ I have highlighted this link as it has relevance and guidance (for all genders) to many of the topics on this list, not just domestic abuse.

Drugs

http://www.talktofrank.com/ - for support, worries (about yourself or others), facts and directing you to treatment. Live chat available 2pm - 6pm. 

Eating Disorders

 https://www.b-eat.co.uk/about-eating-disorders/help-and-treatment - this looks like a great first port of call if you have recognised you need treatment, or as extra advice if you are already receiving help.

Food Poverty (see also Cooking)

https://www.citizensadvice.org.uk/benefits/help-if-on-a-low-income/using-a-food-bank/ - a first port of call for if you think you need to use a food bank (for food and such basics as sanitary products) - though google your town name and 'food bank' to see if there are any local to you that do not need referrals.

https://www.gov.uk/apply-free-school-meals - you may be eligible for free school meals, your carer can check and apply here.

https://www.trusselltrust.org/ - the Trussell trust have a network of over 400 food banks that not only help with emergency food; they can also help with money advice and fuel banks.

Foraging

http://wilderchild.com/foraging-for-wild-edibles-with-kids/ - a fun way to get in touch with nature and the seasons.

Hate Crime (see also Bullying)

https://cst.org.uk/ - Community Security Trust, ‘A charity protecting British Jews from antisemitism and related threats.’

https://www.childline.org.uk/info-advice/bullying-abuse-safety/crime-law/racism-racial-bullying/ - on this page you can find information on: what is racism and racial bullying, what you can do, why are some people racist, speaking out about racism and more.

http://www.galop.org.uk/ - ‘A national charity providing advice and support to members of the LGBT community.’

https://www.gov.uk/report-hate-crime - ‘Crimes committed against someone because of their disability, transgender-identity, race, religion or belief, or sexual orientation are hate crimes and should be reported to the police.’ On this page you can report hate crime for yourself or others, and find support.

https://tellmamauk.org/ - Tell MAMA, ‘A national project supporting victims of anti-Muslim hate and monitoring anti-Muslim incidents.’

Healthy Eating

  https://www.nhs.uk/change4life/food-facts#3QlU1uUVYI8cqduJ.97 - help yourself/family be healthier and happier. What's really in the food you/your family eat?

https://www.nhs.uk/Livewell/Goodfood/Pages/Goodfoodhome.aspx - a great links page from the NHS to refresh your healthy eating knowledge.

http://www.slimmingworld.co.uk/our-members/free2go.aspx - a plan for increased healthiness and weight-loss, that isn't faddy and won't leave you hungry. Since 2006 they have been offering free or reduced rates for 11-17 year old’s.

Intersex

http://www.ukia.co.uk/about.html - ‘The United Kingdom Intersex Association (UKIA) is an education, advocacy, campaigning and support organisation which works on behalf of Intersex people.’

LGB

https://www.lgbtyouth.org.uk/ - a good starting point for any help/advice you may need from coming out to bullying and more.

Libraries

https://www.gov.uk/local-library-services - find your local library in the UK.

https://www.overdrive.com/ - Libby by OverDrive is a fantastic app and site that allows you to download eBooks and audiobooks from your local library. One of the best things about it, apart from instant access 24/7, is no late return fees!

Menstruation

https://www.bloodygoodperiod.com/blog/ - Bloody Good Period aim to end period poverty, and over on their blog there are plenty of articles that give insight into living with periods.

https://www.nhs.uk/conditions/periods/ - the NHS are the best place for learning the basics about periods and sanitary protection if your health education has been sparse.

Mental Health

http://www.samaritans.org/how-we-can-help-you/contact-us - if something's troubling you, get in touch - call Freephone 116123 (UK and ROI) 24 hours a day, 365 days a year.

https://youngminds.org.uk/ - the UK’s leading charity championing the wellbeing and mental health of young people.

Mindfulness

http://mindfulnessforteens.com/ - a comprehensive guide to mindfulness for teenagers, with free guided meditations and exercises. Some good links from their own resource page.

Motherhood

https://www.nhs.uk/conditions/pregnancy-and-baby/ - NHS's pregnancy and baby guide, right through to toddlerhood.

http://ymgt.org.uk/ - 'At Young Mothers Group Trust, we provide young mothers between the ages of 16 and 25 with a wide range of support...'

Porn

https://childline.org.uk/info-advice/bullying-abuse-safety/online-mobile-safety/online-porn/ - 'This page is for ages 12+. Some of the language and types of things explained aren't appropriate for younger children. Some young people watch porn or are curious about it. It's normal to want to know more, and it could make you feel anything from aroused to disgusted. However you feel - there are a few things that are good to know about online porn.'

Poverty (see also Food Poverty)

https://www.salvationarmy.org.uk/poverty - emergency assistance, debt advice, saving money and local support for job seekers.

https://www.understandinguniversalcredit.gov.uk/employment-and-benefits-support/ - ‘Universal Credit and other support is available if you need help financially. Find out about financial support that could help you.’

Racism (see also Hate Crime)

https://www.bbc.co.uk/newsround/53149076 - ‘Anti-racism: What does the phrase 'Black Lives Matter' mean?’

Self-esteem

https://www.dove.com/uk/dove-self-esteem-project.html#! - a good place to start for 8 - 16 year old’s or their carers.

Sex

https://www.scarleteen.com/ - ‘sex ed for the real world’ an ‘inclusive, comprehensive, supportive, sexuality and relationships info for teens and emerging adults.’

Smoking

https://www.nhs.uk/smokefree - free, proven support to help you quit. 

Stalking

https://paladinservice.co.uk/ - ‘Paladin is a trauma-informed service established to assist high risk victims of stalking in England and Wales.’

https://www.suzylamplugh.org/Pages/Category/get-stalking-advice-and-help - Advice and help, including further links.

https://www.thesurvivorstrust.org/faqs/national-stalking-helpline - Free helpline: 0808 802 0300 open 09:30 - 16:00 weekdays, except for Wednesday when it is open 13:00 to 16:00

Trans

https://gids.nhs.uk/ - ‘The Gender Identity Development Service (GIDS) is a highly specialised clinic for young people presenting with difficulties with their gender identity.’

https://www.nhs.uk/conditions/gender-dysphoria/treatment/ - ‘Treatment for gender dysphoria aims to help people live the way they want to, in their preferred gender identity or as non-binary.’

Writing

http://www.booktrust.org.uk/books/teenagers/writing-tips/ - an excellent resource for young writers.

https://nanowrimo.org/ - fancy writing a book in a month? The NaNoWriMo (National Novel Writing Month) team will help you. The main event takes place in November, and Camp NaNoWriMo in April, but there are articles you can read on their website to help you do it whenever you like. Oh and it's all free!

Yoga

https://www.youtube.com/user/yogawithadriene - a brilliant YouTube channel for beginners and up to experience the life changing benefits of yoga.